


Maybe Next Time

by allfornoya



Category: Haikyuu!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-27
Updated: 2020-07-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:16:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25547308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/allfornoya/pseuds/allfornoya
Summary: > this is my first time writing a fanfiction so expect a BAD one> expect grammatical errors
Kudos: 1





	Maybe Next Time

**Author's Note:**

> > this is my first time writing a fanfiction so expect a BAD one  
> > expect grammatical errors

Nothing can describe how Sugawara felt when he watched the orange sunset. To him, it’s a miracle to see such a view. He has always been home early, even before the sun sets and if he doesn’t, he always gets to see the view with his other friends when they leave after a full day of practicing volleyball.

But this time, he’s alone. Usually, he won’t care and just go home as usual. But for some reason, he can’t help but stare at the beautiful horizon. His feet can’t move and his eyes were stuck staring at the sunset for no reason.

He stared at it for a few more minutes until he finally remembered what he was up to. He glanced at the volleyball he was holding. He released a heavy sigh as he realized that his ball was not the same ball he thought it would be. 

He almost forgot that his little sister played with it until it can no longer function as it was before. No one knows how Sugawara was devastated when he found out about that.  
He was so torn that he could do a flip just to release the devastation that was welling up inside him. It was a limited edition volleyball he bought before for his whole team to use on his first year in junior high school.

Although he wanted to get angry at his little sister, he just couldn’t. So he just simply said, “Let’s eat.” and patted his sister like it was no big deal at all.  
But deep inside, he was already crying. His mind instantly went through a flashback when he didn’t eat lunch for a whole month just so he could save up some money to buy his dream volleyball. 

And now, he’s ready. He’s now ready to let go of the ball he loved and worked hard for. As Sugawara threw the ball, he was also throwing away a month of hard work. So to say that throwing this away is just a simple thing to do was utterly unacceptable for Sugawara.

He was leaning at the nearest wall and reflecting upon himself when a ball miraculously rolled beside him. 

He picked it up and checked the ball to see if a name was written but there was none. There was something inside him saying that he should keep it, because for some reason, there was something about the ball that makes him wants to keep it.

He doesn’t know if it’s the ball’s appearance that makes him want to do it but his hands unconsciously put the ball inside his duffel bag.

Just as he was about to leave, he heard footsteps running towards him. He looked back to see a man on his varsity jacket looking around. Sugawara isn’t dumb to not realize that this man was the owner of the ball he just took.

Their eyes met and the man ran towards him, still out of breath. 

“Have you seen a ball around here somewhere?” the man asked as his hands were on his knees, breathing heavily. 

Sugawara was debating with himself whether to tell the man that he took his ball and return it or keep it because he doesn’t want to be labeled as a thief. 

It was obvious that the man was waiting for Sugawara to answer. The man’s eyebrows were raised as if he found Sugawara weird as he waited for his answer.

“I- I didn’t,” Sugawara said as cool as possible and turned his back against the man who just shrugged as he continued to search for his ball.  
Sugawara was mentally punching himself for saying such a thing. He could’ve just told him that he took the ball and was planning to return it to its owner but that would be the same as lying. 

When he returned home, he was completely spaced out. He was wondering why he kept the ball and stole something that was not his. “This is definitely not me,” Sugawara kept arguing with himself as the night continued. 

Today, Sugawara really wasn’t himself. He was spacing out the whole day and stole a ball to replace his old one. “Should I go to a hospital for check-up or something?” he suddenly blurted out in the middle of dinner.

His mother stopped from eating and checked Sugawara. “Why? Are you sick?” his mother asked that also made his little sister stop eating.  
He raised his head and realized what he just said so he just shook his head. “I’m fine, Mom. I’m just tired,” he assured and then continued eating. 

“Woah, you got a new ball, Sugawara?” a teammate asked Sugawara as soon as he took out the ball from his bag.

“I borrowed it from someone.” 

He wanted to curse again. How many times has he lied just to get away from stealing a ball? He’s beginning to become someone he’s not and he’s pretty sure it’s a bad thing.

“Really? Your friend is so good at picking the best volleyballs. I heard this brand is really something,” his teammate replied and borrowed the ball from Sugawara as he prepare for the day.

Today will be their last competition in junior high school and Sugawara doesn’t know why he felt uneasy. He’s beginning to feel worried that this uneasiness might ruin their game later so he tried to clear his mind and just focus on winning.

Now that they have arrived at the competition’s venue, Sugawara realized why he was feeling a bit uneasy in the morning. 

It’s because the owner of the ball he stole was their rival for today’s competition. 

He wanted to hide. No. He wanted to just leave and trust that his teammates would win the game for him but he wasn’t that selfish. He knew that his teammates need him for the seniors’ last competition for junior high. 

“You look familiar.”

Sugawara stiffened when he heard the familiar voice talked to him. 

“Oh, I think you were the one who approached me the other day looking for your ball,” he calmly replied after pretending to remember something. He also wanted to clap for himself for being such a good actor. He could even win an award at this rate. 

The man’s face lit up as he realized the same thing and nodded repeatedly. “Right, right!” his face beamed. 

“By the way, the name’s Daichi, and you are?” 

“Sugawara,” he said, ignoring Daichi’s hand that was up in the air for quite a long time now.

He doesn’t want Daichi to know that his palms were sweaty right now. Maybe because he’s nervous about the game or about the fact that he stole something from the man in front of him. Maybe even both. 

Luckily, it was time for the match so they had to separate ways and meet again on the same court later on. 

As soon as the match started, all of the players were fired up. And Sugawara was impressed with how Daichi played. He kept receiving their ace’s jump serves and supports his teammates along the way. By the way he played, he can pass as a team captain. 

Sugawara felt that their last match as junior high school students was satisfying. They lost to Daichi’s team and although they feel quite down because of the loss, they were still full of energy as they felt that this was the best game they ever had and it wasn’t that bad for a last game.

“That was a good game,” Sugawara heard the same voice again while he was on his way home. He looked back, although he just want to run. 

“Oh, hey, Daichi, right?”

Daichi nodded and caught up to Sugawara. He just wanted to walk with someone after a tiring day and it just happened to be Sugawara, whom he just formally met on the same day.

A few minutes passed and no one was talking. It was just pure silence as they walk on the same path. Sugawara wasn’t used to the silence so he was the first one to break it, “Did you win the finals?” 

Daichi shook his head. “Almost. We won the second set but we lost during the third set by 2 points,” he said and sighed as he thought about that moment.

Sugawara’s mouth formed an “o” when Daichi told him about the news. They weren’t close but he could relate to what Daichi feels about losing by just an inch. It’s like getting something that is almost within your reach but someone got it before you. 

He knows it very well.

“There’s still high school. That’s what I said to myself earlier,” Sugawara shrugged and looked up in the orange sky. “If you lost today, then there’s still tomorrow, or the next day, or the day after that.”

Daichi looked at Sugawara and then on the road in front of them.

“Well, I guess you’re right. Karasuno is a good opportunity to start again.”

Sugawara’s eyes widened and looked at Daichi. “You’re going to Karasuno, too?” he asked.

“With that reaction, I suppose you’re also going to Karasuno for high school,” Daichi chuckled. 

“Apparently, I am.”

Daichi released a sigh, but this time, it’s not a sigh of frustration but a sigh of looking forward to something. “Well? What are we waiting for? We’ve got Karasuno waiting for us.”

“So you’re Daichi Sawamura,” the captain pointed at Daichi. “And you’re Sugawara Koshi,” he pointed at Sugawara. “Welcome to Karasuno’s Volleyball Club!” everyone greeted the two.

“Karasuno used to be a powerhouse, right?” Sugawara asked and sipped on the can of soda he bought from the vending machine. 

He leaned at the wall beside the vending machine while it was Daichi’s turn to get something from it. 

“From what I know, they did. Now, we’re labeled as “flightless crows” after the failed preliminaries,” Daichi answered and also leaned beside Sugawara. 

Ever since the conversation they had after their match at their last year in junior high school, the two have been close and have been hanging out after class. They were, hmm, inseparable ever since. They’d go to school together and go home together. They were only separated during classes but besides that, they were always together.

“Then, why did you decide to enter Karasuno?” Sugawara asked in curiosity.

“Hmm, the real reason?” Daichi lifted his head as if he was thinking. “I wanted to be one of the people who would regain Karasuno’s former glory. You know, we would be “crows” and not “flightless crows”,” he said with a wide smile.

He turned to Sugawara, “What about you? Why did you choose Karasuno?”

“I don’t actually know,” Sugawara chuckled and shrugged. “I just felt something about Karasuno that I didn’t feel in other schools, you know? I saw my future in Karasuno, or something like that,” Daichi saw that Sugawara glowed while talking about why he chose Karasuno and with that, he felt inspired.

Indeed, they both strived harder than they ever did. Karasuno went to the nationals during their last year in high school, with the help of their first years. Their last match was their match with Kamemodai High which showed the growth of each of their team members. 

“It was a fun journey, right, Sugawara?” Daichi asked on their way home after getting dropped by the vehicle the team rented.

“Indeed it was,” Sugawara said without hesitation. “So, what are you going to do after graduation?” he asked. 

It seems like Daichi knew what to answer because he didn’t even think for one second and answered right away. “I’ll travel the world, study different languages and still play volleyball from time to time,” he said as he had a vision of his future. “What about you, Sugawara? Any plans?” he asked back.

“Hearing your plans made my plan back out a little bit,” Sugawara chuckled and stopped by the vending machine, as usual. “But anyways, my plan is to go to Tokyo and make a name for myself there. Though, I don’t know which field of expertise I’m going for. I was just hoping that Tokyo would be my city of dreams,” Sugawara told Daichi.

Sugawara threw the soda can towards Daichi but it slipped on Daichi’s hands. That made them both laugh as their conversation went from a serious topic to a casual conversation.  
Everything was fine then.

Sugawara went to Tokyo as planned. He worked in a television company for a few months with the help of a connection from his friend. He and Daichi communicate with each other from time to time. Daichi told him that he was travelling around the globe, having the time of his life. He even sent pictures with the Eiffel Tower and other more popular tourist spots. 

So when the first thing he saw when he arrived from Tokyo was Daichi on a wheelchair, everything fell apart.

“Sugawara! It’s been months! How are you doing?” Daichi greeted with a smile, as if he wasn’t bothered by the fact that he was on a wheelchair. 

Worry was evident on Sugawara’s face. It’s as if he can’t believe it. What was wrong? What went wrong?

“Daichi, why are you on a wheelchair? Are you injured? I told you not to push yourself on playing volleyball too much. You should’ve enjoyed travelling more,” Sugawara said while checking the condition of Daichi’s body. 

Daichi stiffened before he motioned Sugawara to go somewhere private for a talk. 

Daichi was as cheerful as usual. It’s as if there wasn’t anything wrong with him. It’s as if he wasn’t on a wheelchair, while here’s Sugawara who couldn’t say a single thing because he was worried it was something serious. But he’s wishing it wasn’t and that it’s just a simple injury he got from playing too much.

“What’s going on Daichi? What happ—“

“Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis,” Daichi answered and leaned comfortably on his wheelchair. 

“What?” Sugawara asked in confusion when Daichi blurted out a random medical term he doesn’t know about. 

Daichi sighed and looked at Sugawara. “Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis, Sugawara,” Daichi repeated.

“I heard you, Daichi. But what does Amy-whatever means?” confusion was clearly written on Sugawara’s face while trying to figure out what’s going on.  
“It’s my condition right now, Sugawara. This,” he pointed at his legs. 

But what’s bothering Sugawara right now was the frequent twitching of Daichi. His arms and shoulders would twitch from time to time, a thing that was obviously not normal.  
“ALS affects my motor neurons. It kills them. Meaning, I’m losing control of my muscles,” Daichi explained. Although he tried to be cheerful, this time, he couldn’t hide the disappointment. 

“What— I thought you were travelling abroad? You sent me pictures, Daichi!” Sugawara was panicking as he picked up his phone and showed him the pictures Daichi sent when he was “supposed to be” abroad.

“I did go abroad. The original plan was to travel around the globe and have fun. But I found out about my illness and went abroad to find a treatment because our country doesn’t have a cure for it.”

“And?” Sugawara waited. 

Daichi lowered his chin. “Th-There was no cure.”

Sugawara couldn’t take it. It’s as if he was taking bombs consecutively. It was news after news and he definitely couldn’t take any more of this. 

“It can’t be—“ Sugawara kept shaking his head, like he wasn’t believing any of it. He couldn’t believe anything. He doesn’t want to believe that this is happening. Daichi was alright when he last saw him and he just couldn’t take it that the next time he saw him, he was already on a wheelchair, greeting him as if nothing was wrong at all.

“I’ll lose control of my other muscles soon, too, Sugawara. It just happened to be that my legs were first to give up on me. Next time, I won’t be able to talk and eat properly. I even won’t be able to move,” Daichi kept dropping all possibilities in the future.

“And I won’t be able to smile at you anymore,” Daichi thought. 

“Why should it be you?” Sugawara was shaking as well, trying to not breakdown in front of Daichi because he knew it would be worse.

Daichi smiled but his eyes were not smiling. “I was supposed to be in the hospital today, confined and all that. But I practically begged my doctor to just let me out today. So, I was hoping that you’d come with me somewhere. Can you join me, Sugawara?” 

Sugawara nodded slightly. “Of course,” and then gave Daichi the warmest smile he could give right now.

“Why are we here?” Sugawara asked while his eyes were roaming around the park. 

Only a few kids were with them because it was already late in the afternoon. Sugawara sat at the edge of the bench while Daichi stayed on his wheelchair, beside Sugawara.  
Daichi looked at his wristwatch, “It’s time.”

“Time for what?” 

Daichi motioned Sugawara to look at the view in front of them. The sun was already setting. It was a beautiful sunset. Parts of the trees were blocking their view but the sunset was big enough for the two of them to see.

“It’s beautiful,” Sugawara unconsciously said while looking at the beautiful horizon.

“I realized that sunset has played a great role between the two of us,” Daichi started and Sugawara looked at him by his sudden talk. “When we first met, there was a sunset. On our first decent conversation, the sunset was peeking at us. After a tiring day, we’d go home together with the sunset.”

“And because of that, I love the sunset,” Sugawara said. “So much,” he added.

Daichi was taken aback but later on, he nodded like he already knew what Sugawara was talking about. And he could relate to him. He also loves the sunset so much.  
“Yeah, I know,” Daichi whispered and carefully leaned on Sugawara’s shoulder as they both watch the sun slowly setting, signifying the end of a day.

“You should eat three times a day, Daichi. It’s not healthy to skip meals,” Sugawara lectured Daichi while he was fixing the latter’s blanket on his body. 

“You know I can’t eat properly, Sugawara. It’s hard,” Daichi softly said as he rested his body, preparing to sleep. 

Sugawara stopped like he realized something. He was calming himself, reminding him that this is all going to be okay.

It has been weeks since Sugawara learned about Daichi’s condition. He promised Daichi that he would take care of him in the hospital since Daichi’s condition has been worse since then. Now, he’s weak to even move his arms and legs. He’s stuck 24/7 on his bed and Sugawara was the one who’s helping him throughout the day.

While Daichi’s sleeping, Sugawara was wide awake finishing a script about a new program their company will be releasing next month. Stressed couldn’t even describe what Sugawara’s feeling right now. But he’s not complaining because he loves doing his job and he loves taking care of Daichi.

“Captain!” the door opened and the whole team of Karasuno was there, entering one by one. 

Sugawara and Daichi was shocked to see them but later on entertained them by hearing them talk about what happened with their lives after they graduated.  
“I’m sure captain’s going to be fine. The doctors are going to find a cure and we’ll all be playing volleyball again soon!” Hinata exclaimed.

Daichi smiled at the sight of Hinata, all cheerful like always. 

“I know, right! Daichi’s strong. He’ll pass through this,” Nishinoya continued after Hinata.

“Daichi, you better be fine even after years of this. Will you keep letting Sugawara take care of you for the rest of your life?” Asahi teased and Daichi only laughed.

Sugawara looked at his watch. “It’s getting late. Have you guys eaten dinner?” he asked.

“We’re planning to eat at the restaurant nearby,” Kiyoko answered. 

“I’ll join you,” he said before he turned to Daichi. “Will you be fine here?” he gently asked.

Daichi nodded. “I will be. Go on,” he motioned Sugawara to join the rest of the guys who were already near the door. 

“Alright. I’ll be back later. Sleep without me,” Sugawara said and followed the others.

The group arrived at the restaurant and they were as rowdy as usual. “I’m sure Daichi will be fine. He can get through this,” Tanaka said while they were eating. 

Ennoshita nodded slowly. “He will be.”

Everyone became quiet. And all of a sudden, everyone was crying. Even Kiyoko who rarely shows her emotions, even Kageyama, who was once labeled as a selfish king who only cares about himself and even Tsukishima, who was known for his smug attitude, were all crying. 

No one talked. Maybe because they all know what each other’s feeling right now. Even though they were hoping a cure would be found soon, they can’t erase the possibility of what the doctor said that his body might give up soon.

Sugawara stared at the members before a tear escaped from his eye as well. 

Months passed by and Sugawara still stayed at the hospital, taking care of Daichi, whose condition became worse and worse as the time passes by.

“This is the last one,” Sugawara said as he was feeding Daichi a porridge. His heart ached as he watched Daichi struggling to open his mouth just to eat what he was feeding him.  
“Good job,” Sugawara praised Daichi when he finished the last spoon of porridge. 

Sugawara stood up from his seat and cleaned the utensils they used. For Sugawara, it’s becoming a part of his daily routine, feeding Daichi and taking care of him. His day won’t be complete without it.

But he loves what he’s doing. The only thing bad was that it hurts to see that Daichi’s struggling to move even a bit of his muscles. He’s struggling to talk, and he can’t eat properly, just as what Daichi warned him before. So, here’s Sugawara trying to be the one who’s going to complete what Daichi’s missing. He feeds him and helps him prepare for the day.

“I forgot to give you something before. Someday, I’ll return it to you,” Sugawara announced as he remembered something.

Daichi looked at him as if he was asking what it was. “It’s a secret,” Sugawara was thrilled when he said that.

“W-w-whe-when?” Daichi struggled to speak but he was too curious to what it was that he spent all his energy trying to say one word.

Sugawara was shocked about this but he smiled and hugged Daichi. He stuffed his face on his neck before he whispered, “Maybe next time.”

Maybe next time.

The next time Sugawara was talking about was supposed to be the next day. It took him years to finally have the courage to give Daichi the volleyball he stole from him before. He was quite excited as he walked down the hospital hall, on his way to Daichi’s room, while carrying the volleyball.

But he stopped on his tracks when he saw the doctors and nurses who were rushing towards Daichi’s room. 

Sugawara couldn’t move. He was wishing it wasn’t what he was thinking right now. Daichi should be fine and it’s just the regular treatment he’s getting. But he can’t remove from his thoughts the fact that the medical staffs are stuffed inside the room.

It took him more than one minute before he finally rushed to the room. He saw Daichi struggling to breath, and slowly losing his pulse, according to the doctors. Daichi’s eyes were almost closing. 

Sugawara was panicking and he’s worried that maybe once Daichi’s eyes were closed, everything will be over.

“D-Daichi,” he called while he was shaking, looking at Daichi.

Daichi noticed him and their eyes were locked on each other. At that moment, Daichi took all the energy he had left to give Sugawara a smile he hasn’t give ever since his condition worsened. 

It also took Daichi everything he had as he mouthed something to Sugawara. When he realized what Daichi was trying to say, Sugawara broke down. His knees were trembling as he watched Daichi slowly closing his eyes and as soon as the vital signs monitor beeped, he fell on his knees and his tears were continuously flowing on his cheeks. 

Sugawara couldn’t do anything. His body’s tired and his mind’s tired. It has only been days since Daichi’s death and yet Sugawara still hasn’t moved on from it. He refuses to do his work despite the incoming deadline. 

Just as he was about to sleep, his phone got a notification about a new email. Even though he promised himself to not check his phone for the time being, he felt like he needed to see what the notification was about.

He almost fell from his bed when he saw what the notification was.

From: daichi*******@gmail.com

I didn’t waste a second and pressed it.

From: daichi*******@gmail.com  
To: me

Hi Sugawara! This is kind of awkward for me, writing something to you because we rarely text since we’re always together. But here I am.  
I wrote this exactly 1 year ago today, 2 months after we separated ways. I scheduled the date in which this email would be sent and I’m guessing right now, I am no longer with you. 

A few days ago, I went to the doctor for check-up since I noticed there was something wrong with me. Today, I received the result that I am diagnosed with amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. You probably know this already but I’m telling it anyways. 

I may lose my control with my muscles. I often lose my balance so my mother decided to buy a wheelchair for me. So now, I am on it and it also pains me to know that I can no longer play volleyball with you like usual. Nonetheless, I hope you will continue to play even without me. 

I just want you to know that I know that you stole my volleyball a few years ago.

But don’t worry. You can keep it because it has always been yours in the first place.

I deliberately pushed the ball so you can see it. I was so glad when I saw you keep the ball in your duffel bag. I didn’t label you as a thief though. 

I saw that your ball was all messed up so I decided to at least try to cheer you up by giving you mine. I also took that opportunity to talk to you by pretending to find my ball. Though I don’t think you were actually happy because I think you were worried about what I might say if you told me you took my ball. 

I hope that even when I’m gone, you’ll continue to live your old life. And I want you to be happy. I don’t want to see you shed even a tear but I know you’re stubborn so you probably would cry. 

Just know that I am always grateful for your presence and that day you talked to me while on the way home from our tournament was one of the best days of my life.  
Keep the ball with you so you know that I am always here with you, watching your every milestone and I’ll stay until the end of your journey.

Take care! ;p 

Sugawara was left dumbfounded after he found out that all this time, Daichi knew that he had his ball. He doesn’t know if he should be glad or what. He just knows that Daichi purposely gave the ball to him to cheer him up.

“You’ve already done so much for me. Why are you like this?” Sugawara weakly said as he cries himself to sleep.

“You’re here again, Sugawara,” Sugawara looked at Asahi who sat beside him on the bench. “Ever since Daichi left us, you’re always here watching the sunset,” he continued.

On the first month of Daichi’s death, Sugawara couldn’t move on. He would cry every time he is reminded of Daichi. But he learned how to accept his death. However, his heart still ached whenever he thinks of him. His heart ached but he never cried. 

“You know, Asahi, I hated sunsets.” Sugawara said cautiously as if he was trying to find the right words to say. “I hated how sunsets remind you that there is an end to everything. I hated it so much,” he clenched his fist.

“But ever since Daichi left us, sunset reminded me of him. The sunset reminds me so much of him that I thought he was the sunset. And now I started to love the sunset,” Sugawara smiled. “Because I think that in every sunset, Daichi’s waving goodbye and keeps on telling me that he’ll come back again tomorrow to watch me for another day. That he’ll come back, no matter how many times it takes, just to see me every day.”

“I’m sure Daichi’s going to be proud if he’s seeing you right now,” Asahi said as he also stared at the sunset, imagining it was Daichi.

“Daichi mouthed something to me before he closed his eyes,” Sugawara said and Asahi turned to him, waiting for Sugawara to tell him what Daichi’s last words were.

“I’ll stay with you next time,” Sugawara softly said, like he was preventing his tears to fall. “That’s what he said,” he lowered his chin as he clung to the bench for support.  
Asahi smiled. “He’s too whipped,” he chuckled.

Sugawara stood up and motioned Asahi to also stand up so they can go home. Before he completely turned his back away from the sunset, he smiled and whispered, “See you tomorrow.” 

THE END


End file.
